Thursday, September 30, 2004
Hey Jude, Don't Make My Bed...

Jude Law, you are way way way too hot in that new movie Alfie. Holy Christ, I wouldn't even be able to make out with you because you are just too pretty. And I don't mean no frilly-froo-froo-pretty either. GOOD GOD MAN. WAnna come over? I just made some amazing grilled cheese! I used baaaaaa-sil...

*growl* Yum-my. Totally on my Movie-Star husband list.


Warning Siren

Well, here's some good news - my cat hates barfing as much as I do. He just had another hairball encounter (that makes 2 in 6 months) and he howled bloody murder first. He howled so loudly, in fact, that I actually recognized the pre-vomit terror.

Poor little fellah. Now who's gunna clean that up?


To Whom It May Concern:

  • If you drive a pickup that could be featured in a country song, and you feel you need to also have those decals that look like bullet holes, try to space them apart so they don't look like buckshot. (Unless, of course, that is what you were going for...)
  • If you are standing at the crosswalk waiting to cross, and pressing the little button, you only need to press it ONCE, not the 50 thousand times I witnessed just while driving past. Streetlights are on timers/sensors, dumbass.
  • If your name is Scott Peterson, stop pretending you are innocent, you damn dirty liar.
  • If you are going to drive you and your "landscaping" employees around in your pickup truck with too many passengers, then please, for the love of god, stay off the interstate. We all know you will drive no less than 15 miles under the speed limit.
  • If you see me signal to change lanes, and you speed up so I cant get in, expect to be cut off when my lane ends asshole. Don't look all surprised, you big phony.
  • If you make a movie with marianettes with creepy eyes, know that it will scare the living shit out of me.
  • To Jessica Simpson: I don't think your voice is that good, and I think you look like a dude in drag, but that isn't my issue. My issue is that when you sing, you cover every spooky face in the catalog of my nightmares. Seriously - you contort and twist that square mouth of yours and open it up wide like a big bear trap. You give me slightly fewer shivers than the puppets making the list ahead of you.
  • To Phylicia Rashad: not only were you tv's best mom when I was growing up, you were also once married to the lead singer of the Village People. You suddenly are twice as cool in my book.


Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Over the lips...

Here's something I definately never thought I'd hear myself say:

"Well that's cool, because it looks just like a uterus." heh


Seriously, I'd Love to Scream as LOUDLY as I Can

First off, this crying crap has to stop. I cant. stop. crying.

(Update: Funny when you DO stop, you feel super refreshed and uber productive. I may even start packing today - well, once I get home from work. I actually feel better right now, because I feel like I can do this - that I need to get my shit together and take care of myself for once. SO liberating!)

Secondly, I sent one of the toughest emails to write EVER this morning. I asked my dad if I could stay at his house until I figure this out. I don't want it to come to that, because he will never let me forget it, but I am so sick of not knowing if in a month I'll have a place to live, I had to give it a shot. If he says no, I'm screwed. I looked into like the Economotels and stuff, and not only do the monthly rates rival rent, but they require a hefty deposit, which I do not have because all my money has been used on bills or borrowed. I am just so stuck. I swear to god, I told myself I would never let myself get into this situation again where I may not have a place to live. I'm 28 for crying out loud. WHY DO I LET MYSELF DO THIS CRAP.

(Update: My dad is allowing me to come back home if I need, WITH the kitty in tow. I'll have to put my stuff into storage, but he's willing to let me come back (plus SenorFurball too - which is amazing). All with no lectures too. Things are definately on the up-and-up.)


Stick a Fork in Me

I'm totally and completely spent. Mentally, physically and emotionally I really don't have a lot of energy, even if I were to combine the three. I feel like I've been crying for a week straight (and in a lot of ways, I have). My mind is racing too much to sleep, but I'm too tired to really stay awake. Part of me is ready just to crawl in bed and stay there until Christmas. A larger part of me is actually seriously considering this option.


Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Lesser of 2 Weevils

Thought better of that post, and decided to simplify:

I think I need to get away. I need my life back.


Good Gnus.

So I bought this "Healthy Choice Chicken Teriyaki" frozen thing because it was on sale and I had a coupon (which brought it to roughly a buck and a quarter). Holy crap is it tasty. AND a lot of food, unlike those meals that rhyme with Mean Visine. Oh, and Friends today? Cracking me up. So, I'll be in my jammie-jams and feeling really blah if anyone is looking for me.

And by anyone I mean creditors or maybe The Law. Yeah, THAT would spice up tonight...

Oh my god. I have really cheap almost-ready-to-bake chocolate chip cookies!! What puts the "almost" in the "ready-to-bake" you ask? All you need to add is 1 egg and 1 stick of butter.

I HAVE EXACTLY ONE EGG! I HAVE A STICK OF BUTTER! Holy crap, I'm totally burying my face in fresh baked chocolate chip cookies. 400 lbs., here I come! And with a smile on my face and chocolate on my chin! suh-weet.

When baking, use spatulas carefully. When you are overzealous in your cookie preparation, the little bastards snap like twigs.

(Made a really great snapping sound, though.) hhehhehheh


Tomorrow, Tomorrow

Ok, ok. I know. Shut up Angie.

So you don't think I'm not doing anything about this, here's what I'm doing tomorrow, in one, long sentence (because that's what it feels like):

ApplyingforfederalaidAND GettingpaperworkforfoodstampsAND Applyingeverywhereunderthesuntowork4jobsAND searchingforanewplacetoliveforhalfofwhatthiscostsAND nothavingacompletebreakdown.

Really, I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, that's not the point of my ranting. I never want anyone to feel sorry for me, because that's just lame. Once again, I got myself into this and I'll get myself out. I just don't really have a ton of people close to me that I can vent on, so internet, this is for you.


Saturday, September 25, 2004
Lady Luck

Here's some fun news:

I may be moving. No not because I'm going to another city, or because I found a better place, but because they can EVICT us for not paying rent. Yehaw. I have just enough for my half, and well, that's about it. I've tried to pay just "my half" of rent before and that ended up with Angie sans apartment and in court. So.

Well, so here's my options if it comes to that:

  1. Put my stuff into storage and me and the cat either find a place for 250 a month or sleep in the car.
  2. See number 1.

Unfortunately, that's about all I have for choices right now. I can't afford to "move-move" as I have no savings. I'm trying to get another job, but I can't find anything that will work around my existing schedule (won't matter anyway I guess if I'm in my car). I refuse to give up my cat, because finally I got an animal and he's part of my family now, for crying out loud. So. I don't really have any options. Suggestions would be greatly appreciated.


Thursday, September 23, 2004
Terrible Twos

Today is our two year annimaversary.

Just like every anniversary.

Just like every other day.

One day I'll get to be all pretty and go have a special date with cocktails. (I'd do it tonight anyway sans date, but I've got a wild amount of work to do.)


Monday, September 20, 2004
Kitty Kristmas

Because I am that girl who will post pictures of her cat, and because I felt the need to go out and buy some things for my cat today, I decided to let everyone see the results.

I bought this for transportation, as a possible disciplinary aid, but apparantly that idea is out the window.

Someone hates the collar something fierce too. This is one of like 15 pictures of him scratching it.

So I bought a little wall scratcher thing for him to act as a "hair gatherer" of sorts. He was very interested in this.

THIS is why he was interested.

And can we discuss the fact that he BITES HIS NAILS??

This was *finally* before The Napping of the King, and as you can see he is VERY ashamed of the new collar. He can't even look at himself in the mirror. Tough cats do NOT wear little bells.

Yeah, my cat rules. What you can't see was the licking of the mighty collar bell for a good 45 minutes. I personally was unaware that a cat could do that with his neck.


Sunday, September 19, 2004
Dear Dial-up

Dear Dial-up -

When refreshing a page with very few pictures, please try to not take a goddamn 10 minutes.

Thank you.



Friday, September 17, 2004
Open Invitation

If I move back up north, Bob we TOTALLY need to hang out.


Thursday, September 16, 2004

Special? SPECIAL?

Screw you FOX, you dirty tease.



If you appreciate a good poop story like I do, then let's all join hands (washed first!) and go read this.

(And the next entry about Leta is pretty funny too - totally my nephew Eban, from what I hear.)

In other news, my father actually said to me today regarding his recovery: "I've been on my back more than a hooker". GREAAAAT. (You people wonder where I get it from - now you know.)


Guess What Day It Is??

The OC! The OC! The OC!

GROSSS! I swear that GAP commercial with Sarah Jessica "Barker" and Lenny Kravitz is not only lame, but disturbing as well. It'd be like using footage of a fatal car wreck to sell you a new VW.




Wednesday, September 15, 2004
To Clarify

I guess I should follow up a post like that with one like this.

Things that go right for Angie:

  • No matter how broke I am, I almost always seem to have *just* enough money to at least pay the important bills and 95% of the time have food in the fridge.
  • I've had some pretty asshole-ish boyfriends. However, I have never been abused, cheated on, or completely screwed over.
  • I have a really great family.
  • I have a really good sense of self-worth. I know what I'm capable of, where I rank on the "cute" scale, and what I have going for me. I will never, ever have an ego problem, because frankly, I don't give a shit.
  • I've been fortunate enough to not go to 1 college, but 3. I now have 2 degrees to show for it, too.
  • The few people in my life that are my friends have been my friends for some time. Almost all of my friends I've known for at least 5 years.
  • Even if I don't go out and be social, I still can have a damn good time by myself. I guess it's the raging independence. Movies alone? Hell yes- it's way cheaper.
  • I may not be "worldly", but I've gotten the chance to see about 75-80% of the US.
  • My cat is really cool. Naughty, but cool.
  • I've never had to purchase my own car. Granted, they've all been used to hell before I got them, but they are still MY car.
  • I have never been in jail, rehab, a drug bust, a whorehouse, Cabrini Green, or in the hospital with anything life threatening. I have, however, been trapped in a port-a-potty while on "halluccingenic substances" and TOTALLY FREAKED OUT. (To anyone who may read this and want to fire/disown me - I was like 19. Haven't been around anything illegal in like 8 years or something. Seriously. I'm all goody-goody now.)
  • I don't believe I've ever broken any bones, and I've never had a cavity.
  • Even considering the drama as of late, I've been lucky enough to been so in love that it hurts to breathe.
  • I'm thrifty, resourceful, crafty, and a damn good shopper.
  • I really have good ethics/morals, and honestly (and not self-righteously), I am one of the nicest people you'll ever meet (although don't cross me, I'll cut you).



The past 6 months, in a nutshell:

  • That one event in April which I won't explain but know that it was REALLY not good.
  • The shootout next door with the cops and the street blocking and the guns.
  • The fighting from downstairs. OH GOD THE FIGHTING.
  • The kid (stranger) who WALKED INTO my apartment because I didn't answer the kicking of the door.

  • My brother - in the hospital - serious - ok now.
  • My niece - in the hospital - not as serious - ok now.
  • My nephew - MRI for the possibly epilepsy because of the SEIZURE - ended up ok.
  • My sister - mental and physical problems - reoccuring and troublesome - ok now.
  • My grandmother (I learned last night) - emphysema - has to take an oxygen tank with her everywhere now - very serious - never ok.
  • My father (I learned last night) - indefinately in the hospital - was life threatening - jesus.

  • Happiness - tanked ages ago.
  • Social - little to no interaction with anyone.
  • Location - with the exception of the jobs (which I love) and my dad here 5-6 months out of the year, I feel very misplaced here - always have.
  • Relationship - hmmm... that's a thinker. It's pretty up in the air. *shrug* Who knows.
  • Life - I don't feel like it's mine anymore.

Oh, and for the record, many times "we'll see" means "not a chance in hell". Be aware that I know that, and also know that I am aware of things as they stand. Sometimes I just have to think more for myself than ever before.


Saturday, September 11, 2004
The "H" is for "Holy Shit - THAT'S Who That Is!"

It struck me immediately - the WHOLE time I'm watching the Count of Monte Cristo, I'm thinking "Damn, he looks like Jesus."

Well, apparantly Mel Gibson thought so too.


Carolina On My Mind

I know this sounds selfish, because my mind should be on today's events, but I'm stuck on something that for me hits a little closer to home.

It looks like The Boy may be in NC/GA longer than we thought. Turns out, the studio isn't finished yet, so they can't start recording until October 1st now. Then, with that and the possible impending tour afterwards, it could be well into mid-to-late November and possibly even later than that before we get to see each other. We've done this whole distance thing before, but it just seems different now, because it isn't like he's on tour and then coming home. In a lot of ways, it's like he already IS home, and I'm nowhere near it.


I can stick it out and I really want to make it work, but as more time passes, I'm starting to wonder if he feels the same way.

ALSO - not dealing with this too well, just so ya'll know. And no friendly weekender visits either. That's already been suggested and, unfortunately, 86'd.


Thursday, September 09, 2004

I H-A-T-E being this sick, ESPECIALLY when I was supposed to go to work and take care of some things this morning for my other job. Dude, there's just no way. I feel like I'm in a headlock by the Swamp Thing, and I look like that last scene from Rocky with his eyes all beefed out. Oh, and the UBER EXTREME fatigue - I shoulda known this was coming because I've been a zombie all week.

UPDATE: Still sick as hell. Between the sweating and the throat razors and the screaming headache, my crabby ass is finally going to lay down. GET OOT!!

UPDATE PART DEUX: Well Jesus - the nap helped, a little, but woke up so sweaty I could've drowned. You know it was a good one though, because I woke up and had NO idea what day it was.


Wednesday, September 08, 2004

My neighbors downstairs are fighting so loudly, that I can hear them above both the tv and our extra-noisy air conditioning.

"Bitch!" "You're the bitch" [THUD] "Crackhead" [CRASH] "Call the po'lice!" [SMASH] "Biiiiiiiiiiitch!" "Call the POHLICE" "F*** YOU!" "GET OUTTA MY F'IN HOUSE!!" [SLAM] "Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!!!"


Tuesday, September 07, 2004
A Letter to My Ex-Brother-In-Law

Dear Dipshit,

It has come to my attention that you recently brought yet another child into this world. Let me tell you about how damn pleased I am about THAT. *grrr* Another son. Your 3rd (4th??) productive poking has resulted in yet another child who you will undoubtedly dumbify with your horrible role-modeling and your endless stupidity.

What's odd though, is you didn't (to my knowledge) ask the girl (who is the stripper you cheated on my sister with) to "take care of it". Why? Because you ACTUALLY WANTED THIS ONE. What's worse is in your infinate clever-osity, you gave the boy the *perfect* name.


Are you freaking kidding me?? You named the poor thing ATOM?? As if that child isn't going to have enough struggle in his life, being the product of you and her, you gave the child a name reserved for scientists and geniouses.

You dolt. Seriously.

Just when I thought you really shouldn't be allowed to breathe, you manage to taint the one chance you had to be a remotely worthy parent.

Nice job, dumbass.

- Angie


Monday, September 06, 2004
America's Cock - Screwed Again

Looks like after 2 gigantic spankings, Florida may have to take a good ol' beating from Ivan too.

Seriously God, they've paid their dues for that whole "election thing". Even I say they've had enough.


Saturday, September 04, 2004
"big, lactating brains"

You know, finally something just made my day. heh.


Friday, September 03, 2004
Damn, Gina.

You know you're in the firm grip of a bout of WICKED depression when chips and salsa constitutes a "sensible dinner" 4 nights out of the last 5.

The fifth night? Frozen pizza.


Wednesday, September 01, 2004
Shout. Shout. Let it all out.

Someone in my complex is TOTALLY rockin' the Tears for Fears in true ghetto style - the bass volume MUST be at 11. Suh-weeeet.